Today
We Celebrate
The Death
Of all things
Thought heard
A golden horn
Blown, sounding
A proclamation
That the rapture
Is upon us
Finally,
the self-appointed
to my left sighed
Dirty bastards
come and get me,
declared the man
at the end of the bar
In a deep breath
I swear I could
Smell eternity
For the first time
A tap at my shoulder
Judgement stood, waiting
I turned
Last call, the bartender
shouted, wringing
a filthy bar rag
between trembling hands
I know
The flames
Lick the back
Of my neck
With a whisper
In my ear, smiling
Hands promising
Batting eyes
As a thousand times
The righteous fall
Around me, lights
Once shown bright
Extinguished, bursting
From my eyes
On this day, turns out
No one would be saved
This is such s powerful writing River. The writing of a master.
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Thank you, that’s very kind of you to say.
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My pleasure River. It’s an unbelievable piece.
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Powerful!
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Thank you, Luisa.
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Your poetry takes me beyond the surface River, between the lines… “In a deep breath
I swear I could Smell eternity For the first time”. Powerful in meaning and purpose!
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Thank you very much, Holly.
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WOW. This blows my mind away! Smelling eternity for the furst time – just WOW, pure brilliance
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Thank you!
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Perfectly crafted story-telling, River. Your writing engages all the senses, making your work come alive to create a vivid picture and a feeling of tension, anticipation and fear. I have to agree with the other comments, I absolutely love the concept of being able to ‘smell eternity for the first time’, and similarly, I love ‘Judgement stood, waiting.’ Superb wordsmithing, as always.
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Thank you, Alli. I always appreciate your feedback.
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Amazing, as usual.
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Hey, Rita.
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😊
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Powerful.
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Thank you.
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Beautiful!
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Thanks!
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This poem captivates all the senses.
“In a deep breath
I swear I could
Smell eternity
For the first time
A tap at my shoulder
Judgement stood, waiting”
Those lines shiver skin and bone!
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Thank you so much!
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An all-powerful piece of poetry gives one much thought to the troubled times of the world – excellent !!
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Thank you!
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You set the bar high, River!
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I see what you did there. Thanks, Eric.
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I swear I could smell it too.
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Somehow, you just know what it is.
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Could you email me when you get a moment? thestoriesinbetween@gmail.com
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Almost as horrifically powerful as the flames raging through Mallacoota…….
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Scary stuff, my friend. Take care of yourself down there.
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Oof, that power! Wonderful!
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Thank you!
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well written as usual
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Thank you, Sara.
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I had to read that one twice. Impressive!
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Thank you.
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“lights
Once shown bright
Extinguished,” – It gave me goosebumps. Great line.
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Thank you very much.
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A very powerful piece. Well done River!
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Thank you, Leigha.
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You are welcome.
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Spooky shit. Perfect, love it.
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Thanks, H.R.R.
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Nice!
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Thank you!
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Wow, powerful piece, River!
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Thanks, Mitch.
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These words make me think of Australia and what they are dealing with. I can imagine they might feel they are being judged, and punishment abounds. Well done, River.
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Thank you very much, Susi.
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Bars, pubs, and taverns can be places of revelation. Only in darkness can you see the stars.
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Very true. I know I’ve spent my share of nights drinking like the world was about to end.
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Skoal! 🍻
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I echo the above compliments. I’m curious about the picture. It brings all kinds of story ideas to mind. Did the picture inspire you? Did you write and then look for an accompanying picture? Which came first? And where did the picture come from?
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I always write first and then scour public domain sites like pixabay or unsplash and try to find a photo that will compliment the poem. This particular photo isn’t what I originally was looking for, but I feel it works.
I’ve tried writing using a photograph or other artistic piece as a prompt but it has never worked for me. Thank you for reading.
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This is awesome!!!!
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Thank you, Kevin.
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My pleasure, brother!
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Amazing writing 💜
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Thank you very much.
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I’ve often thought about this moment! The moment of reckoning. Love the poem River!
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Thank you very much!
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Amazing poem, River!
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